Plopped onto earth again

Hi
I don't know how long it has been, but it sure feels like it has been a thousand years since I step into this side of the world.

Yes I am still alive!

I've never been so good at going missing, I aced it. SMSes were sparse too, I think everyone thought i might have chewed my phone in my stressed and confused agonized mind. Anyway i thought i should correct a popular belief that I am stressed. Actually i dun get that. I just get sad.


So, it definitely helped to have great colleagues and that God is always only a conversation away. I don't pray, I just whined. Like "Oh GOD...why like that......." to.. "OH DEAR GOD...I am so tired....... " to..."GOD, I want to give up...." and "Father, please bring me the taxi....."

Yes, I have been down and out... dealing with exasperating stuff at studio.. re-do re-do to infinity..a simple thing until it made me feel like crap that I can't even do a simple thing..in fact, a simple yucky stuff that I am utterly ashamed of but I just couldnt seem to change it.....and so someone (anyone) will say of cos my self-worth is not based on a simple stupid paper design...but still trust me..at those times..u just feel like crashing your head into the monitor screen in front of you and just die there. And the auntie sweeping the floor the next day will just think " joy to the world! she finally decided to stop killing so many trees printing so many urgly designs." Maybe you dun understand but at least, my monitor will agree with me. oh maybe my boss too.

Then came a bout of... dealing with machines that are 3 times bigger than me... machines that can saw off your fingers and drill holes into your palms..machines that can chew off your head... yes.. I am good with using all these.. tell me if your house needs renovations.. and don't be surprised I can hammer nails into walls like a man. Yet, this whole nei nei prototyping process is killing me cos' I am just not good enough! I can't build a good model without faults without having something go wrong. They just have to break down on me..and my stubborn hands simply can't craft the material into what I need them to be! I just jinxed all machines that I work with... well done pris. well done. *faints*

So..... work is tough for stupid people like me. I need a new brain.

But thank God, a small battle is over for me and I came out..not totally unharmed...in fact quite bruised on both my ego and my fingers..but when the dust settled and the exhibition opened....there was a small frame of time to reflect. I didn't go hide out at lil india, my pensive lil' room. I just stood at my exhibition place and looked at it all. So much to be done better..so much that can be done better.

This time it didn't get me down as much. I understood something. That i really need to kick my lazy laidback blur negative nei nei attitude aside and take some positive actions. And so i always talk and no action and that is no good.

A lil bit of sincerity, a lil bit of focus, a lil bit of purpose.

It was actually hilarious and at the same time alarming, that I dreamt of pastor deb. one night and she just said, "you are selfish." haha. wierd. but got me thinking. yes maybe.

So, in a few days' time..it's another battle. This time a goliath all the way till January end. I hope to be ready then. And I hope to be like David.

Before that, a lil advertisement, our team's exhibition is at

Sculpture Square,
located along Middle Road,
Opposite Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts, walkable from the Central Library at Bugis/ City Hall there...
Near Laselle... opposite Fortune Centre
It's till 6th December.

Entitled "Object as Architecture, Architecture as Object"

do drop by to be a lil bit inspired!

The Singapore Design Fest is simply getting better and better... so.. maybe we can organise a trip to go around the different venues that will be exhibiting if you all are keen on sunday after service..designs..art installations..architecture... all things you can identify with even if u r not a designer.

The opening party was over for our exhibition at sculpture square so there are no longer free drinks and cocktails..but there are other party venues throughout this week still. I am sorry for not notifying anyone. I didn't realised I didn't informed anyone cos' my stupid brain couldn't multi-task.

Meanwhile take care and see you all cos i have landed on earth again finally.
I hope I bought a one-way ticket this time.

:)