Saturday, September 11, 2010
11 09 10
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
words can't bring me down again

couldnt sleep tonight.....with these thoughts on my mind
Christina Aguilera - Beautiful
I am beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down
So don't you bring me down today
Was thinking back on the mini-game we played during our leader's cell group whereby we wrote affirming words for each other on a white paper stuck to our backs.
Many a times I looked at those sheep entrusted to me and wonder how can I help them find breakthroughs in their lives. I definitely can see myself in them. Seeing them struggling with broken self images and measuring their self worth against their achievements or whether or not they have BFs. I know what is it like when words from family, superiors, friends & colleagues "bring me down". I definitely feel their pain ..knowing that I can only offer prayers & advice....it's a valley they have to slide down with GOD alone. See themselves the way God sees them. Love themselves the way God loves them. Then they can truly experience breakthrough.
I am thankful for the journey he had brought me through for in 2 Corinthians 1:4 the lord has comfort me in all my troubles, so that I can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort I have received from God. Occasionally I do feel myself slipping back down the beaten path back to the nerdy, pimply, low confidence girl that I used to see in the mirror.
But words can't bring me down again. You and I we are beautiful no matter what they say. But someone needs your words of affirmation today!
Psalm 45:10-12
Listen, O daughter, consider and give ear: Forget your people and your father's house. The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord.
Monday, May 17, 2010
The Potter's Work
[God's words to me]
My child,
You are the clay in my pot and I wish to shape you in the form I want you to be in.
Will you allow me to do so?
It may take a long time and it may be a hard process.
Will you still wish me to do so?
When I see parts of you that are displeasing to me, I will remove them and that act may be painful and tedious.
Do you still trust me enough to allow me to continue my work in you?
I promise you that you will be in the best form you can ever be in if you allow me to work in you.
And I promise you that I will be with you until the day you finish your race.
Will you trust me now?
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Over the span of time I've been here in Sweden, I faced with various situations that vexed me and these situations caused me to become a changed person. I was changed unknowingly and it's only when I reflected on my actions and my struggles recently that I realised the change in me.
You must be wondering what are the changes in me now...
(Is it.......... ??)
Perhaps, I should allow your imaginations to run for a bit..................................................................................................
After all, everyone who goes overseas on exchange becomes........................................................................................
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or struggles with...........................................................................................................................................................
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HAHAHAHAHA.
Okay, I ought to stop now! Just in case Mel begins panicking and calls me up all the way from Singapore... (Not that I wouldn't want to receive her call, that is. But I wouldn't like the tone she will start with me...) Haha. Kidding Mel, you are always calm and collected. ;)
Getting back on topic, seriously this time, the change that I've undergone is the change in my heart.
As I began to interact with new people or friends that I never knew much, I started to develop a hardened heart. I looked at the lifestyles that the people around me were living, and for a while I felt that pain and emptiness within them that caused them to party all the time. But soon, I lost that compassion and love for them. I soon turned oblivion towards their actions and behaviors, and even became somewhat accepting towards them. I accepted them for who they were, and recognised that these people were difficult to change. But as I lost compassion and love for those people I thought were hardened, I began to lose love and compassion for the people that I truly cared for too.
A while ago, a friend was struggling with her thesis and assignments and had continuous breakdowns. She asked me for prayer and so, I prayed. She wanted to pray together, and we prayed together on skype. Everyday, even though we prayed, she still struggled with her work and was unable to live in God's promises for her. After a while of daily prayers together, I grew tired of her struggles although I didn't want to admit it to her. Despite me still agreeing to pray together with her whenever she asks for it, I did it begrudgingly. She always called when I was in the middle of something. I was in the midst of my meals. I was in the midst of my work. I was in the midst of my dramas. I was in the midst of.......................... All in all, she was becoming a chore.
Then I told her, "You really have to believe in Him after you pray. If you keep praying and you don't believe, what good is it to you? God wants you to have faith to believe in Him!"
I do not know if my words affected her, but after that prayer, she apologised for having disturbed me continuously.
I was disturbed. My actions or irritation towards her caused me to feel guilty. I felt that I lacked compassion and love towards her. After all, she was really struggling with her assignments and she really needed prayer. I ought to have been understanding to her........
With guilt pouring down on me, I prayed to God in earnest: "Lord, give me love and compassion. Soften my heart. I want to be more like You. Help me Lord!"
I prayed and I prayed. I thought He didn't answer me because I was still suffering terribly. I met with another Swedish friend and I begun to feel that she was getting on my nerves with her continuous calls in the middle of the night.
"Are you at the party, Elaine?"
"Are you going to the party tonight? I thought that we can walk over together."
"Is your phone spoilt? You didn't pick up my call just now."
I was irritated. There was only so much excuses I could give before I had to turn to creating lies to pacify her. I started to avoid her calls and even started to avoid her on Facebook chat.
I forgot that maybe, she was feeling lonely. Maybe, she just needed a friend to hear out her continuous chatter. Maybe, she needed God.....
My friend reminded me yesterday that God did answer my prayers. I asked for love and compassion and He put me in situations to learn love and compassion.
I can't say for certain that I've gained love and compassion for all these people. But I know that I've begun to love.
Love is simply when I forget its difficulty, and do as Jesus did. He loved. Simply because.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
[My response to God]
My Lord,
I have learnt that it is never easy when I choose to take the path You want me to take. But do as You please with me. All I am is Yours.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Come ALIVE for Him!
I haven't heard from you girls for about 5 months? Or at least, it's been long since I last seen you all... ! I do miss you girls sooo! Even though there are much lesser cell sessions this year (or so I heard), I do miss attending cell with you girls, and attending church service together etcetera... All in all, you girls are just so much fun to be with that it's hard not to miss you at all! Heh ;)
It seems like everybody is ultra busy because of work, TGIF, ministry and what not... But I just wanna tell you guys to press on for Jesus! Even though it may be tiring at times with so many things to do for work and God, indeed, your treasures are all stored in Heaven. If you can imagine now the amount of gold, diamonds, mega-huge house (or whatever you love) that are building up now, you can be assured that it's definitely worth it! Not that you guys are greedy about that, of course. I'm just attempting to put across the message that God sees all the hard work you've put in for Him, be it in school or work or ministry, and He is definitely proud of you BIG TIME! :) So, even if you may feel overwhelmed right now, and you may feel discouraged, but know for that your race with God is not going to end until you breathe your last breath. And till then, He will uphold you and be with you throughout the good and the bad. :)
HOW AMAZING OUR GOD IS, AREN'T IT TRUE?
I read Jennie's previous post and I could sense that she was overjoyed when she saw how her members grew in the Lord. What more will God feel when He sees the labour you are putting in for Him now? He is certainly feeling ecstatic and well-pleased with you all now, no matter what you may feel about your current situation! And for YOU THERE that is feeling content in the Lord, don't be! Because the Lord wants you to WANT MORE! He wants MORE AND MORE of you! And as you lay hold of God, He will reveal to you different sides to Himself that you've never known about. As you grow in your knowledge of God, you will grow to become more like Christ, of which I know is what everyone of us desires very much to be like. :)
If only I can simply be like Christ, I thought to myself all the time when I struggle with various situations... If only, if only... I longed to be free of those ugly emotions that surge within me and reach towards my final destination. But God is more interested in the process, or in other words, the journey we will take to reach our final prize. Are you too? Only through the process do we learn anything at all. What is the prize if no sweat or blood has been shed? What form of treasure would it be to you if you received your desired item without working for it? It's the same logic. God wants to give us the blessings He promised unto us, but unless we first seek for it, we won't know that we were actually lacking in that area. Only when we seek shall we find. As it's said, "Seek and you shall find. Knock and it shall be open unto you."
SEEK FIRST THE KINGDOM OF GOD AND IT SHALL BE ADDED UNTO YOU:
That's what He said, didn't He? I often tell myself to do that, and so I do as He asked me to. I sought Him first by reading His word in the first thing in the morning. I obeyed His instructions to pray for somebody when He tells me to. I attempted to put away my anxious thoughts and waited for Him to add it to me without me asking Him to... I tried. But many times, my attempts fail and I question the Lord: "I thought you said that it shall be added unto me when I seek you first? Why then has it not been added unto me? I thought I heard from you that you will bless me... Why are you silent now?" It was then that I realised. I have not truly understood His meaning for His words. When you truly seek Him first above all else, you will 'forget' all that you desire for because you are so blessed soaking in His presence that nothing matters. And then, that's when the adding comes. When you are feeling blessed by His presence, He will bless you with more. You can say that our God is a jealous God. He wants all of us, but He will never tell us so because He allows us to choose as we please. If you choose Him, He will choose you too and He will add unto you the desires of your heart. Because you know best what God desires for you, and He will give it to you.
Honestly, I used to be seriously anxious for a relationship. Even though I still want to be in one, I am no longer anxious. In front of me is a paper that writes of my purpose in LuleƄ. Out of the many I wrote, one stands out from the others:
"TO BE AN INDIVIDUAL THAT WANTS GOD MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE"
I am that individual right now (or at least I hope I am) because I told God that unless I learn to first put Him above all else, I can never be satisfied no matter what or who He gives me. I don't want to compromise because of my desires or wants when I know that what He wants for me will be the BEST THING I can ever have. :)
To all my FAVE LAYDEES, continue to trust in Him for that SOMEONE in your life. He heard your prayers and He knows your needs. As the song goes, "IN HIS TIME, IN HIS TIME. HE MAKES ALL THINGS BEAUTIFUL, IN HIS TIME."
He will provide for you in His time. This I am sure of.
Signing off,
Elle
Sunday, April 04, 2010
God answers prayers
It's been a super siong weekend for all of us, rushing from party after party like 'pao3 ge1 tai2' like that. (wahh my language has become super 'cui') Lol.
Anyway, i believe all of us are physically tired, but praise be to God! I know seeing our cell members rise up, seeing salvations upon salvations, are really food to our soul...and inwardly we are being renewed day after day.
Von and i were on the train today and i saw a random man's bag with the word "REVIVAL" on it. I know God is reminding us that revival is truly here...not because we're laboring physically, but because we fought the battle on our knees.
Just wanna share that i'm really v encouraged by my cell members...
Found out yesterday that J and E actually fasted together for their friends to come. And i remember last week's altar call they went down to pray that their fruit would not be prematurely stolen by the devil (friends invited would not back out). I didn't tell them, but i was so touched deep inside. I know God is doing a great work in and through them. Miraculously, both of them brought like 8-12 friends each. And many of them responded to God.
G and P also had spiritual obstacles...camps and matches and events that clashed last minute with the parties. And they struggled...but chose to put God above these things and come nonetheless. Put in a lot of effort making intricate doorgifts, meeting up to buy things and plan.
Even though i've shared my testimony for so many times i'm starting to get sick of it...and watched Suz's video so many times i can act it out...Somehow, at every party, i feel touched by God's love all over again. Touched by the video i've seen again and again. Amazed by the lives that God has transformed. Awed by the sacrifice He chose to make for us on the Cross.
And when i see raised hands, open palms during altar calls...especially the one at Von's house...i still remember that tears were swimming in my eyes.
IT'S ALL WORTH IT.
To see souls saved. Broken hearts healed. Lost sheep find their way to the Shepherd.
It's a thankless job. People might even shun or mock you for it. But it is our calling. To preach the gospel to the ends of the world until every person in this world come into His Kingdom.
Let's persevere on...for the work we're doing has eternal significance. We're not laboring for fame that comes and fades away, or wealth that can be robbed away anytime. But our treasures are in heaven.
ALL HEAVEN REJOICES OVER THE SALVATION OF ONE SOUL.
I can just imagine, Heaven must be super noisy and chaotic now.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
27 01 10
Friday, January 01, 2010
Shine for Him-- Do the hard thing, walk in faith
That is hard. For faith means that the centre of our life has to shift from ourselves to God. And that is hard for two reasons.
First, we are all deeply self-centred. We want our own way; we want to be served rather than to serve. That is what is implied by original sin. To live by faith often goes against the grain. Part of the problem is sorting out which desires are self-centred and which are God-centred.
Secondly, the realities of faith are not visible.
The Letter to the Hebrews describes faith as the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. (11:1)
Such things are, by definition, not yet in our possession. We are more at home with what we can see, feel and touch. But No one has ever seen God. (John 1:18).
And though Jesus has made him known, we do not now see Jesus. It is by faith that we know him in Word and Sacrament, and hold on to what he said:
I am with you always, even to the end of the world. (Matthew 28:20)
But that is the world in which we live, the world in which God calls us to spread his good news. So we should make our own the apostles' prayer:
Lord, increase our faith!
And also the prayer of the man whose son was sick:
Lord, I believe; help my unbelief. (Mark 9: 24).
You spoke to me really hard, hard for me to accept that i have to do the hard thing in order to shine. I realise that it is hard 'cos i lack faith.
Lord, help me to have faith, to shift from a life of self centredness to one that is God centred. What really gives me joy is to know that i am walking in your will. That will take my eyes off the situation and fixed them on you. I want to continue to fix my eyes on you and walk by faith, not sight.
So that in the absence of results, of positive-looking situation, of praises and affirmation of man, that i will walk with confidence 'cos i am certain of your voice. Even in times when i am uncertain of the plans ahead, help me to have stillness in my heart and trust that you will reveal in your perfect timing. Lord, i relinquish the rights and control i still hold over my life, i surrender it to you again.
I don't want to seek the approval of man but i want to seek your approval.
Lord, i give thanks cos all of my days are held in your hands. Use my 2 hands, my life for your purposes. When i am weak, strengthened me. When i don't feel good enough, i thank you that you have chosen me and anointed me.
Lord, by faith i claim that 2010 will be a good year.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Testimony!
After the cholesterol crisis, there was the bone-knee crisis. Apparently the knee-joint was crooked, and she needed to go through an operation which would land her in a wheelchair for 3 months. She was very afraid, and did not want to go for the operation.
Today, she went for physiotherapy. The physiotherapist told her that her condition had improved a lot, and she only needed to come for 5 more therapy sessions, and surgery was no longer required!
My mother came to me so excitedly to share with me what had happened. She shared that her cell sister had testified that she had prayed to Jesus in desperation to heal her of her cancer in the hospital, and when she woke up to take the test, her cells had reduced to normal and she no longer had cancer!
As such, she decided to try it as well. On the way to physio, she prayed really hard. And Jesus came through for her. She was so touched she started tearing while telling me about it. And she was telling me that she wanted to share her testimony on 25th, at her cell group's Christmas party.
Are we ready for Christmas? God is so good that once we've experienced Him and seen His glory, there is no stopping us from sharing His story. Even for my mom who's a new believer and the only Christian amongst a Buddhist/Taoist Chinese community, she can't help but proclaim that God is good. Because He is.
Thank You Jesus. There is truly nothing that You cannot do. =)
Monday, October 12, 2009
Sunday, August 09, 2009
Slow Fade
Sunday, July 26, 2009
seeing things God's way - Kingdom Value
Sunday, July 19, 2009
accountability
Friday, June 26, 2009
I have to know what I'm publishing before I publish.
So I went and read about this girl.

At the age of 4, Charmaine has been diagnosed with neuroblastoma.
According to Wikipedia
Neuroblastoma is the most common extracranial solid cancer in childhood and the most common cancer in infancy, with an annual incidence of about 650 new cases per year in the US. Close to 50 percent of neuroblastoma cases occur in children younger than two years old. It is a neuroendocrine tumor, arising from any neural crest element of the sympathetic nervous system or SNS. Neuroblastoma is a solid tumor that most frequently originates in one of the adrenal glands, but can also develop in nerve tissues in the neck, chest, abdomen, or pelvis.
Esthesioneuroblastoma, also known as olfactory neuroblastoma, is believed to arise from the olfactory epithelium and classification remains controversial. Since it is not a sympathetic nervous system malignancy it is a distinct clinical entity not to be confused with neuroblastoma.
Neuroblastoma is one of the rare human malignancies known to demonstrate spontaneous regression from an undifferentiated state to a completely benign cellular appearance.
A disease exhibiting extreme heterogeneity, neuroblastoma is stratified into three risk categories: low, intermediate, and high risk. Low-risk disease is most common in infants and highly curable with observation only or surgery, whereas high-risk disease is difficult to cure even with the most intensive multi-modal therapies available.
For more details, click here.
Charmaine is currently in the 4th stage and fighting hard. It breaks the heart of everyone that such a sweet and cheerful little girl has to undergo so much pain and suffering at such a young age.
I hope that everyday as we enjoy, keep a short time for this little girl. Keep her in your prayers before meal; Keep her in your prayers during your quiet time. If you would like to help her with some donations, click on the banner right at the beginning of the entry. Or go to
- Go to http://ourfeistyprincess.com/
- Contact them at ourfeistyprincess@gmail.com
- Go to http://ourfeistyprincess.blogspot.com/2009/06/on-cash-donation-and-pay-pal.html
If there's not much you could do, click on the banner below, upon reaching the page. Please click onto the nuffnang ads that you see right at the beginning of the page. The proceeds from the ad will be used for her.
If you would like to know more, click here. There's a note for everyone.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Saturday, April 04, 2009
Faith confessions!
Hebrews 11:6
It is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to Him must believe that God exists and that He rewards those who sincerely seek Him.
You know the times when we say things for the sake of saying it, and without meaning it? It’s the same thing that often goes for faith. I say, ”Lord, I pray that you will bless my friend with good results.” But soon after, I begin discussing with my friend the impossibility of scoring well in the coming exams given the difficulty of the subject. The Lord says that it is impossible to please Him without faith. And I thought to myself, “But I do have faith.” And go on stressing over my problems after I make the prayer.
What then is faith? Faith can only be called faith when you do not doubt at all. Absolute faith, though difficult, works miracles! I believe that when the Lord says, “faith as small as a mustard seed can move mountains”, He means it. Literally.
We did something in cell today that I thought I will practise for the rest of my life.
Faith Confession is speaking a word of positivity about the things in your life. It’s not just about speaking positively, but also about proclaiming positively. Many times, I make prayers like “Lord, I pray that you will help me with…” or “If it pleases you Lord, give me…” Even though there’s nothing very much wrong with prayers like these, they somehow sound more like a desperate plea to the Lord.
We are given authority to claim God’s blessings for us! And I’m gonna claim it all, in Jesus’ name!
I believe in the Lord that:
- Jenn’s dad will be saved!
- Mabel’s parents have reconciled!
- Von’s family will be saved!
- Mel & Regina’s financial needs will be met!
- Cheong’s family will be saved!
- Sandy’s bf will come back to the Lord!
- Juan will serve the lost!
- Gwen’s knee is completely healed!
- Fiona will attain favour from her superiors in teaching!
- Olia will be a minister at her block!
- Sik Peng will attend church regularly & complete all her work before her exhibition!
- Ros will find a stable job & grow mightily in the Lord!
- Suet will serve & grow in her church!
- Debbie’s family to have peace!
- PD will find a husband!
- I have aced my exams!
Last but not least, that WE WILL ALL FIND OUR LIFETIME PARTNER! God-fearing ones, of course! According to his time! :)
Prayer Slots on April 8
Below are the prayer slots allocated to us on the coming Wednesday. Please take note of yours, aights?
12-1.30pm: Charmaine & her girls
1.30-2pm: Olia
2-2.30pm: Gwen
2.30-3pm: Mel
3-3.30pm: Fiona
3.30-4.30: Jenn & her girls
4.30-5pm: Juan
5-6pm: Regina & Ros
6-6.30pm: Elle
6.30-7pm: Von
7-7.30pm: Sandy
7.30-8pm: Mabel
If you have problems with your slot, let Mel know asap alright?
-toodles! :)